Why do I feel so unsettled in my spirit? I sit here trying to understand it. It is not a feeling of failure and I am very sure it is not depression. So that’s ruled out. I’m just unhappy and feeling unfulfilled; at least those are the two words I can attribute to it.
So, the Unrestrained Worship concert is done, now what? Next steps? I hear crickets but there’s stuff to be done! We need a music video for example. I have a life outside of the worship ministry. I’m an entrepreneur so why do I have no urge sell my products and make money? This is not laziness, it is almost what I fear is a nonchalant attitude and that is more dangerous.
Laziness versus a Nonchalant Attitude
This led me to google the difference between the two. One thing that stood out with laziness is the unwillingness to do work or make an effort which in my case is not the situation. I want to work and put in effort, I don’t just feel the excitement for it. Now, let’s look at a nonchalant attitude.
Synonyms include unconcerned, unserious, laid back, indifference, unenthusiastic and guess the antonyms – anxious, concerned; which were exactly what I was feeling. My confusion is why? I just had a successful, stress free concert – why in the world am I having anxiety about anything at this point? Shouldn’t I be getting ready and pumped to get to the next steps?
What’s the solution?
What’s your driving force when you feel like this? I realize I have to be careful with my answers because I don’t want to go back to that cycle of just surviving instead of thriving.
What is the remedy? I started to write my goals for the rest of the year and I realize it is already half of the year and being the kind of person I am, I don’t like not having a new goal in place that I am going to tackle/work on as soon as one is accomplished. That’s how I keep boredom away.
So, let me ask you; if you are feeling like I am right now – what are your goals for the rest of the year? Write them down, add start and end dates. It may also not be enough that it is on a tablet; maybe put it on paper and paste on the fridge so that the entire family is seeing it and can hold you accountable.
This scripture comes to mind – Habakkuk 2:2; paraphrasing here – God asked the prophet to write vision and to engrave it plainly on tablets so that whoever reads it will run with it. We read the bible at times that we just gloss over it. This is God saying, write it down because He knows us that we will forget and start to fret where there should be no worries. Writing it down makes your life easier, writing it down keeps it in front of you, in focus and within eye range so that when your strength begins to fail like mine was, there can be an instant shift. I say shift because until I did this, I could not make the shift.
Your vision will not fail!
Writing it down also makes this verse 3 of that scripture pop at least for me – for the vision is for a future time. It hurries toward the goal of fulfillment, it will not fail. Even though it delays, wait patiently (doing due diligence, do not fold your arms); it will certainly come, it will not delay. This is a reminder to you that God has just started with you and you can’t get tired before the journey begins.
No amount of anxiety can bring a vision that should come to fruition at the end of the year to come in the beginning of the year so do your homework. Some of your worries are not even that big of a deal! Some of us don’t even know what we are worried about! Sheesh!!!
Keep your Eye on the Prize
One of the things I told myself as I sat at the dining table is to keep my eye on the prize but to do that, I have to understand and know what the prize is. And secondly, there is a process and I’m going to have to trust God throughout the entirety of it, not some of it. There are no short cuts to staying in the process. Stay in there even if it gets uncomfortable and you are being stretched. It is the discomfort that should drive you to ask what the problem is so you can begin to find a solution.
Figure it out!
In my case, I had to figure out what I was feeling in the first place. Was it laziness or a non-nonchalant attitude? Once, that was out of the way, I was able to define my next steps which now include shooting a music video for one or all of my new releases, shoot live FB videos to talk about my Hempworx/My Daily Choice products (thinking multiple streams of income), iron out details for going back in the studio to start on the songs for the full Album and starting to plan Unrestrained Worship Volume 2, 2020! Now, that was a mouthful but at least; I’m not anxious and I can spend my energy working towards these. I have no time for this unnecessary worry.
I also need to get out there and be proactive about the worshipwithgladys brand. It’s a whole movement, I don’t want to shut it down before it even begins! There are lives that are dependent on it!
At the very least one of the things I identified and will own up to is that my anxiety was self-induced! So for my people out there who identify with this kind of anxiety, take a step back; identify the root cause of the unease, figure out your next steps and continue your journey. Do not count yourself out. Keep your eye on the prize but trust the process to the prize. There are no short cuts, if you need training, get it. If you need to research, do it! If, you need to take a step back to re-evaluate, don’t hesitate. Better to take a step back than rush through it and fail.
Till the next post, take care of you! By the way, did you download your copies of Yahweh, My Praise and Yes? It is available here